a little slice

so fb is down right now. i am obviously going through withdrawal. they say it's down for upgades, which I assume means they are finally unleashing Parakey so that fb can become even more integrated into my biological system.

my mom offered to give me her new computer in exchange for mine. I feel wrong taking it. I don't think i'm going to. I think my mom just feels sorry for me, and doesn't know what to do, so she just hands me computer like a dog who comes home with a dead bird as a gift.

most of the things in my life right now are broken. to name a few: guitar(s), ipod, 3 computers, heart .

finally going to work on Thursday. should be a change.

I am neurotic.

I am fatter than my mom. I seriously needs to make numerous life changes…now.

Upped the meds, please work.

fuck me, i had a photo i wanted to upload…bleh i just want to cross out this entire post…

“Status (gmail.B3EFA01D): Do Not Disturb: V, as the days go by, I'm falling more and more”

I have no fucking clue what is going on with me now. you could ask me, and I wouldn't know. I really feel like, i don't care if this is a harry potter reference you can go fuck yourselves lol I really feel like at some point I died, someone used the resurrection stone on me, and now here I am, or “I” am.

I am starting to think that 4am is early for the night to begin. I sleep all day, and play all night, and that may be okay to Yellowcard but not in this world, no not really. Except, sometimes I get grossly sentimental or rather nostalgic about that song, because it reminds me of just doing instead of thinking. And just doing things to get your heart pumping, and to be ridiculous, and scandalous, and break the laws, and be bad ass. but i suppose you get to a certain point when that is all boring, and the risks have to be greater to get the same rush.

at some point i will put up scans of my brother's instruction booklet he we given in Iraq, it's pretty cool in the ignorant wtf kind of way.

I might be going to see Plain White T's on Friday. that should be cool.

I just want to go back to monotony, and people telling me what to do.

most people don't think I am, I suppose that's a good thing in a way. but i hurt all the same. i don't think the meds are working, anymore. so now i'm just stuck in my head…

God damn it people, I am trying to read Harry Potter! I am being sequestered like whoa, I'm only about a third the way through ahhh degrassi style drama.

I am trying out this new photo emo thing, stealing the idea from Joey/others, but mainly inspired by Joey. This is my first shot, I haven't quite worked out the details, tell me what you think.

god damn it, looking at it I think the “on” is actually an “an” fuck fuck fuck you god damn it photoshop….

back to potter and fixing computers!

Dude, Casey and I were watching “Get the Picture.” Has anyone ever seen this show? the judge Mike O'Malley is a huge DICK lmao omg he is amazing. There was a question that involved giving an impersonation of Pee Wee Herman, and like the kids were so confused and retarded and then Mike goes “come on guys, we're really going to need an impersonation here” the kids just look back and forth at each other for a wile and then he's like “really guys…seriously now…” then “…doesn't he do something a little like 'hey hey hey'” then the girl goes “heh” and then he's like “what are you kidding? the judges are taking it, guess so, that sounded more like you doing an impersonation of me doing a horrible impersonation of pee wee herman”

god damn I love it when people get spanked like that, schadenfreud all the way! lol

aghhh I am going to write about Rochester, I swear, I am just being mind fucked left and right.

also, i'm going to start doing that emo photo poetry bullshit, be prepared.

“Status: Do Not Disturb: Ice Coffee, Techno, and V are the only things getting me through the day… oh and Shardule (how could i forget)”

Jesus Christ I didn't think you could lose yourself so much at once. Also, not that I am knockin' on drugs, but that V is either-vagina, vicodin, valium, or some shitty energy drink, either way, when I knew you, you whined because the caffeine in tea made you nauseous and now look at you…

you also used to be above obnoxious away messages broadcasting your life in hopes that I would see it. Yeah I see them, yeah I read them, but god damn this is the first one that made me a little sick.

i hate when I eat not because I am hungry or bored, but because I just want the taste in my mouth, because inevitably I will eat something get that taste in my mouth, then want another taste of something else because of that taste, eat that, then go back to wanting the other taste, then I can't make up my mind about which one I really want to end the night with-then I brush my teeth, and if I fall asleep right after that i'm golden, but if not it just starts all over again…

also, my mom Nina bought guitar hero-for herself- and is reading “invisible monsters” and falling in love with it.

also, Divas anyone? or some other dancing-esque place?

mom: Carrie do you have a roommate?
Carrie: did I? or do I?
mom: do you, for this year?
Carrie: No, I have a single
mom: what? really?! you have to get furniture and make that place a sex pad!

I don't really know what that means, but if it means i get sick furniture, i am DOWN.