god damn it this is like…the third time i’ve lost my wallet. at least I took all the money and shit out, but man, i seriously left it alone for 4 seconds, and now…gone.
anyway, on another note. I watched Funny Games wtf. it’s a remake of an Austrian horror film. Let’s just say, two kids in white gloves show up to your house and then you all die. oh, but before that you’ll be mind fucked and tortured, and then die.
also, i definitely just went to the website…if you “play the game” WTF dude, freals, if someone sent that to me i’d knife them…just sayin…
um. that’s all for now.
i is depressed
Filed under: 1 | Tags: cold stone, complaint, confession, creamery, hacks, sucks
Granted I worked at cold stone almost two years ago, I assume their tactics are still the same. So here are a few tips/rants/etc. about my experience there.
1. Don’t be a douche to the server. A lot of the customers we got at Cold Stone were really irritated with the amount of “pep” that there was in the atmosphere. We don’t like it anymore than you do. It is REQUIRED. As a franchise, Cold Stone likes to say that they sell “an experience” not a product. Bitching at us about how expensive the ice cream is, how weird the names are, how complicated it is, etc., will only make the server irritated and you will probably get the shaft.
2. Taste all the flavors. That said, Cold Stone employees will basically bend over backwards for you, because that’s what they tell you to. You can taste as many flavors as you want, and if you were nice to the server he’ll probably give you huge spoonfuls of it. It got to a certain point where we had regulars who came in to “taste” the ice cream, and they basically got free ice cream.
3. Get the Small. Cold Stone ice cream comes in three sizes “like it, love it, and gotta have it.” Because of the nature of the spades, proportioning is always done wrong. Employees commonly make everything one size bigger. Also, Cold stone makes more of a profit when you buy the medium or larger.
4. Never get the waffle cone. Waffle cones cost cold stone less than 2 cents to make, and cost you 59 cents to a dollar. On top of that, waffle cones are probably the most unsanitary thing at the store, the individual who makes waffles usually drips sweat into the batter/irons, and the irons in general are either cleaned with carcinogenic products, metal brushes, or not cleaned at all. And sometimes, (at least at our store) we stored the waffles in the BATHROOM. If you must get a waffle, try to pick the one you get, servers try to get rid of the “ugly” or “defective” ones.
5. Don’t order the hot fudge. Hot fudge from the fudge dispenser is usually soaking in water that is growing mold.
6. There are mix ins that are not listed, or at least not obviously listed. If you ask any of the employees what they eat at Cold Stone, it’s probably something not on the list, and it’s probably delicious. There are secret mix ins that employees use that are not supposed to be used ie strawberry purree or random seasonal things.
7. Never go to Cold Stone within one hour of its opening time. Everything is very, very, old. The waffles are soggy, the ice cream usually develops a film around it, the fruit is usually undated and probably bad. The morning cleaning crew usually does a really shitty job and typically everything is just stagnant and unclean. Just, don’t do it.
8. Mix-ins. Cold Stone does this thing where it likes to disorient its customers by having “Originals” and “create your own.” An original is a set number and type of mix-ins, for example, Coffee Lovers is almonds, heath, and caramel in coffee ice cream. The originals are a good two dollars or so more expensive than a “create your own.” So unless you plan on getting a lot of mix ins, it is always cheaper to create your own. Mix ins can also be replaced. Something that we would frequently do at work was to order a “Mud Pie Mojo” this thing had 4 mix ins and cost the same as all the other originals and replace the ice cream and mix ins with whatever you wanted, and it is always cheaper than doing it any other way.
9. Not all ice cream is created equally. This is a strange thing that consumers usually don’t understand, at Cold Stone all the mix ins are the same price. Two figure eights of fudge cost the same as a square of brownie. This factor can be manipulated in many ways. Most employees think that fudge and syrups shouldn’t count as mix ins, if you ask for fudge while they are mixing your ice cream, you will usually get it for free. Similarly, if you ask for more fudge while they are mixing, you will usually get that for free too- in general anything asked for during mixing is done for free because the mixer is on the spot and it’s awkward.
10. Here’s an easy way to get two ice creams. Cold Stone has a policy where “if you don’t absolutely love it, we’ll make you a new one.” All employees are required to remake your ice cream, simply if you don’t like it. I once remade an ice cream because “it was ugly.” There are numerous reasons you can give that are easily accepted and we used to hear all the time, “there is a hair” “the oreos are soft” whatever, the employees also don’t usually care so sometimes you don’t have to say much. Then just offer to throw away the old one for the employee, and tada, free ice cream. Well, at least buy one get one.
That’s about it. The only other advice I have, tip your server if you think they did a good job. Working at Cold Stone really sucks and they hate the requirements as much as you do, the sad thing is, during the summer we averaged working 40 hours a week and dealt with sleazy managers who cut our overtime. We were scheduled to work almost all holidays, and got paid minimum wage. Also, if you don’t want them to sing, just ask them not to, and everyone will gladly abide by it 
